The allure of an exotic dancer can be irresistible, and nothing screams, “I want to make it last forever…or just for the night” like penning a song dedicated to the craft of poppin' that thang. Whether you make it rain with dollars or make it hail with quarters (cheap bastards), the sultry shaking of a dancer's hips can be the gateway to the champagne room for some and for others, an ode to the art. Like with this list we compiled for you. Grab your champagne for the campaign and get a little bounce in that bootie with our picks for the Best Hip-Hop Stripper Anthems.
5- Chris Brown- Strip
Listen up folks. It's been proven that no one wants to piss Chris Brown off so when he rolls into a club with his shades on, wearing J's, and has a pocket full of ones, bitches (aka lovely ladies) better show him what they have. Really, is it too much for a man to want to see you go “up and down the pole” while not worrying about “your hair or those tracks?” Yeah, we didn't think so. And really, I think we can all agree that it would be super sexy to think about Brown dropping ones on “dat ass” rather than dropping hammers, right ya'll?
4- T-Pain- In Love With A Stripper
What we learn from this overly obvious love song by T-Pain is that he likes em' thick, he enjoys a good “rollin',” he likes it when he trippin', she playin', and that my friends, is HOT. What a fucking catch. Geez, if only I could find a pole to chafe my vag on and then maybe I could get a gem like T-Pain. Come on, don't we all want this? Am I alone here? Just imagine him longing for you and possibly penning a jam like this in your honor. Until that sweet day comes though, luckily we have this melody to grind to.
3- Bloodhound Gang- A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper Is Crying
Hey, shit happens sometimes and you too might be left “lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert.” Not to worry though because if you find yourself in that predicament, the Bloodhound Gang is here to help. As per their suggestion, you should saunter into your local “hump palace” and find a distraction. What kind of distraction will you find there you ask? Well the best ever obviously because who doesn't love a working girl “grinding against her will” while crying? It's just fucking touching. Literally.
2- Nelly- Tip Drill
This pick featuring the St. Lunatics is a little different because it's really all about an act that is done after a lovely young lady showcases those dance moves that one can't practice in front of family. “Tip Drill” is a catchy ditty that seems to be for facially challenged women seeing as how the lyrics claim, “It must be the ass 'cause it ain't ya face.” And with lyrics like those, what booty popping gal wouldn't want to let Nelly (or one of his crew members) get it in? Well, just the tip. On a side note: This song is so scandalous that a women's studies group at Spelman College protested against it. So yeah, mad props Nelly.
1- Ludacris – P-Poppin'
It's adorable to think that “P-Poppin'” might actually stand for puppy poppin' alas, it doesn't. This Luda song is all about poppin that pussy and while I can vouch that I in fact don't know how to pop my pussy, the chicks in the uncensored version of this video certainly know how to do lots and lots of things when it comes to that area. “Pussy Poppin” highlights all of the things that makes a man swoon like “kissing the sky and making it drop, being pierced in eleven places, and the ever important lesson of not “pulling no hamstrings.” Hands down, this song just makes a gal want to practice getting her “pop” on. Sorta.
Ali Lerman knows much about comedy, basketball, and celebrating Wu-Tang Wednesday. She’s been writing for fifteen years and still calls her mom with grammatical questions.