Tinder Boxed [Hey, You!]

Illustration by Bob Aul

You are the quintessential hipster chick with candy-colored hair, arms peppered with a nonsensical array of tattoos, and a radiant smile. I was the one nervously sitting through a date with a super-cute guy I met on Tinder. You came to the table every three and a half minutes to ask how we were and if we needed anything. What we needed was to not have our conversation stalled every three and a half minutes. I know you meant no harm, but, sister, give a girl some space! How can I get to know a guy if he is spending as much time engaging with you as he is with me? Would you like his number, maybe?

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