The following message was left on a Weekling answering machine. But as you read this, keep in mind that a more competent and diligent and unbigoted school administrator than Frances Claire you'll never know. We just could not resist the urge to mischievously insert phrases in [BRACKETS] throughout her message. Check it out:
Good morning, this is Frances Claire, principal of Mater Dei High School, with a special announcement. In response to yesterday's civil demonstrations [BY MEXICANS], please know the Mater Dei administration and security, in conjunction with the Santa Ana Police Department, secured the campus [TO KEEP THE MEXICANS OUT] and made sure each and every student was escorted to their cars [TO AVOID MEXICANS]. Rest assured, parents, at no time was there any danger to students [FROM MEXICANS] from yesterday's demonstration. Again, today, we are in consultation with the Santa Ana Police Department [TO KEEP AN EYE ON THE MEXICANS] and will do everything to ensure a safe school environment [FREE OF MEXICANS] throughout the day for your students. Please contact us if you have any concerns about the safety of the students [UP TO AND INCLUDING THE MEXICAN ONES.]
OC Weekly Editor-in-Chief Matt Coker has been engaging, enraging and entertaining readers of newspapers, magazines and websites for decades. He spent the first 13 years of his career in journalism at daily newspapers before “graduating” to OC Weekly in 1995 as the alternative newsweekly’s first calendar editor.