Eight Questions With Alfunction

There's not much to say about the Costa Mesa man/myth/legend that is Alfunction.that hasn't already been said, so I'll keep it at this. When he's not playing guitar in SiX, he's screen printing t-shirts, stickers and whatever else he can put ink on and currently he's the guitar tech for Maryland-based rockers Clutch. Oh, he's also got killer facial hair.

Alfunction's also my friend and I hadn't heard from him in a while. With the hectic world that is rock music, it's difficult to get him on the phone, so like the Y2K guy that I am, I emailed him. And now, for your reading pleasure, is the result of our techno-conversation.


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Q:Who are you?
I'm Batman… ok, no really, they call me Alfunction, guitarist,
guitar tech, Costa Mesa native… it's all on wikipedia apparently.

Q:Where are you?

I am sitting in the front lounge of the tour bus, somewhere between Pittsburgh, PA and Asheville, NC

Q: Why are you wherever it is you are?

I am currently working for Clutch as the Guitar / Amplifier
technician, which is the tricky name for “roadie.” I basically keep all
the gear working properly, make sure it all sounds the way it's
supposed to.. it's a fun job, for sure.
I'm on the second leg
of a world tour with Clutch, who is supporting their new Album Strange
Cousins From The West
. I suppose, since Clutch is from Maryland, and
I'm from Costa Mesa,  I am, in fact.. a strange cousin from the west.

Q: Any good tour stories (by this, I mean on this tour)?

We've been filming for a new Clutch DVD over the last few weeks, so
there's a camera crew riding with us, filming everything. I may have to
check the footage and get back to you on that one… or ask me next
week, after New Orleans.. that place always has some characters, and
I'm sure a new story is waiting to unfold…

Q: Where's the hardest city to find vegetarian food?
Oh hell, I don't have to hunt for that anymore… it gets delivered
every day. Although, when I had to track it down myself, I remember I
had a hard time anywhere in Texas… you can find a 72 oz steak in a
7/11, but god forbid you want a burger withOUT the cow.

Q: Of all the guys on the bus, whose farts smell the worst?
Oh,
that title goes to Chase, our fearless drum tech. but on a good day,
I'll give him a run for his money… I honestly can't say I've smelled
everyone's farts (thank god), but some days you just walk past the
bunks and there's a unidentifiable cocktail of collective, morning,
ass-stink that anyone would be both proud and horrified to claim.

Q: Have you met anyone from OC on this tour?
That'd be a negative, but we're only 1 week into this leg of the
tour, so who knows? I don't think anyone but us music people leave OC
do they? 

And the strippers that fly to vegas every weekend to work don't count..

Q: When people around the country find out you are from OC, what do they think?

They immediately assume I'm a rich kid. I think most of them assume
the entire county is like an episode of The OC, or real housewives, or
whatever new show happens to be exploiting that ridiculously rich 5%
percent of OC. sounds nice, but that ain't MY OC.

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